Dolphins just can’t seem to get enough of NYC. Hot on the heels of March’s East River dolphin spotting, we’ve just been tipped off that now a whole pod of dolphins has been seen swimming and doing tricks in the waterway. It’s not clear where the dolphins came from, but officials speculate that a few of them are the Ukranian military-trained “killer” dolphins that reportedly escaped a naval base off the coast of Sevastapol on the Crimean peninsula just a couple weeks ago. According to sources close to the dolphin training program, dolphins going rogue is nothing new, especially since these particular creatures have been in search of love — and they may have found it.


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Though the Ukranian government has denied training a fleet of killer dolphins, sources report that similar escapes have occurred since the 1980s when dolphin training programs were first launched. The knife and pistol toting dolphins have turned up everywhere, from Iran to even off the coast of Rio, Brazil. But the shocking thing is that they’re not looking to kill, they’re looking for, and have always been looking for, love.

“They’re mammals, they’re looking for companionship and to have some fun. They’re just like us — you work too much, you go crazy,” said Vladmir Vodvivaczic, a former Soviet naval officer. “These dolphins just want a good life. They want to swim free. They don’t want to be killers.”

Where the dolphins met up with their female counterparts is stil unclear, but the New York Aquarium thinks that the lady dolphins may have come from their facility. “There was a lot of damage at the aquarium post-Sandy and we had a few fish and other animals flee,” says Jan Levenson, director of the Sea Life department. “They probably swam off to a safer place during the storm, but dolphins tend to always return to their homes. We think a few of those dolphins out there could be ours.”

So, could romance be brewing in the East River? We’ll keep you posted.

Just kidding! April Fool’s!